Making dreams come true

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My heart goes out to people who look at me and tell me that I’m lucky to have my life. They must truly believe that they don’t have the same choices I have or that they don’t have control over their life. They are really missing out on their full potential.

 

I do have a good life. It’s not necessarily the life everyone wants, but some people envy the freedom and lack of responsibility I have. Guess what? I’m not lucky, I made choices to be in my position. They weren’t always easy choices, I didn’t always have the agreement of my family, but I made them and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

 

Since accepting the job on a motor yacht back in February, I have received a few messages from friends saying they admire my ability to take risks. I love taking risks because every time I have, something incredible has come out of it. Whether it’s meeting an incredible new person or going on some cool adventure, something positive is always the result.

 

On the surface I appear to be excited and ready to jump with both feet forward, but to tell you the truth, the inside isn’t like that. My close friends will tell you. They will ask me how I am or if I’m ready and most of the time the response is, “I’m scared shitless and I don’t know how to be ready, so I’m just going to go for it because it always works out.” I normally have one or two days of sheer panic that someone close to me will hear about and have to comfort me and remind me of all the risks I took before and how they worked out. I will have personal moments of wondering if this is really a stupid thing to do and if I’m mentally stable.

 

Then I just close my eyes and jump. Sometimes I land on my bum first and have to wait for the bruise to go away, sometimes I have to turn around and go back but most of the time a beautiful story develops. The end result is that I always end up on my feet, exactly where I’m supposed to be. I’ve been all over the world, I’ve met incredible people, locals and other travellers that have touched my heart forever. I have experienced living in other cultures, I have seen the night sky in the middle of the Atlantic. I have known what it’s like to love numerous people. I have learned how to deal with heart break, ending relationships and moving on. I have found my place in the world. To wander free and endlessly like the beautiful waves that are crashing over the side of the boat and threatening to soak my computer!

 

The point is, we all have choices. Maybe we don’t like some of those choices and it prevents us from doing what we want to do now. That’s ok, just modify the plan to suit your current lifestyle. Dreams can always come true if you truly want them to become reality.

Return to the sea

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Ahhhhhh….. I can finally breathe again! I see nothing around me except blue, blue and more blue. My shoulders have fallen away from my ears, the crease in between my eyebrows has disappeared and a gentle smile fills my face at all times. Yes, I’m back on the open sea. I’m home and I’m totally in my element. Probably because I can feel all of the elements. The wind slightly burning my face, the sun warming my already sun kissed body, the sea giving me gentle kisses as it occasionally sprays up over the bow and into the cockpit, the rain rinsing the damage from my time in St Maarten and the clouds offering me protection from sunburn. I am totally at one with nature and with myself.

 

As I said earlier, I lost myself in St Maarten and I hadn’t met anyone to help pull me out. Five days before my contract with my boat was up, I really started to panic about what was going to happen next. I took some time out to do a long yoga practice as the sun rose over the beautiful mountains in front of the marina. I called their grounding energy and I asked my angels to help me. I asked them for a boat crossing the Atlantic to Palma so that I could get on the sea again and try to look for sailboat work there. The next day I woke up as usual and started working with little enthusiasm, counting down the days until I was done, while at the same time calming my panic. Around 10 am, I checked my phone and received this message, “Hi Sarah. We’re crossing the Atlantic from St Maarten to Palma on the 30th of April. Are you interested in going?” My heart skipped a beat, I looked up to the universe, smiled and said, “Thank you!!” I replied asking where he was and if we could meet. It didn’t really matter. I already knew I was going. I had a good feeling and it was the answer to my calling.

 

I met the Captain and the crew who all seemed so nice, laidback and friendly. The Captain said, “You seem cool, so if you’re up for it, come join us.” I smiled and said, “I’m definitely up for it. Thank you so much.” This is day three and it has been amazing. We all get along well, have fun together, yet respect each other’s space. The boat is big so there is plenty of space. I have my own cabin and am living in luxury. I have a huge waterfall shower, a double bed, I’m cooked for, someone does my washing and they would clean my cabin if I allowed them to, but I won’t. Did I mention I get paid? Yes, this is definitely the life for me!!

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The first two days were a bit rough emotionally. I didn’t feel like speaking to anyone. I just wanted to speak to my true life partner, the sea. We had some chats, she soothed my soul and gave me faith in myself again. With each sleep (and I slept a lot the first two days!!), I felt stronger physically and emotionally. Today, I stayed awake and got to know the crew who are such interesting people. The universe clearly brought us all together for a reason because we have so many common threads. I think we will definitely be helping each other out in the future. The boat is beautiful, a huge catamaran that dances nicely with the sea. A lot smoother than I thought. I took her off autopilot today and steered for a while to see how she moves, wow she really loves the wind. I hardly had to move the wheel at all. I was and still am in heaven.

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I seemed to have caged that crazy monkey again that was running around my brain.  It’s great because I have a whole new journey ahead of me. I will get to Palma with no job, no place to stay, but with all the anticipation and excitement a new journey brings. And the next time that crazy monkey escapes, I know how to tame him….

The man on the plane

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Have you ever seen that movie where girl sit nexts to guy on a plane and they start talking and live happily ever after? Well, my life is a movie. The happily ever after hasn’t happened, nor do I think it will, but I do have my own romantic plane story. It happened on my way from London to St Maarten and was on the Paris to St Maarten lag.

 

I walked up to aisle 39 and was happy to see that the aisle seat next to me was empty. I used to pray that a hot guy would sit next to me so that we could fall in love and have babies, but I had long since give up that dream when no one interesting ever sat next to me on the hundreds of flights I’ve taken. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a guy place his bag on the seat next to me. I carried on being busy on a phone that was already off and he said, “Bonjour.” I had my initial knee jerk reaction of eye rolling and thinking, “Oh god, here, we go. Just don’t talk to me.”  Then I looked at him and he smiled a really kind and big smile and some butterflies appeared in my stomach as I flashed my pearly whites back at him and said, “Bonjour.” I sussed him out from the corner of my eye. After all, I was sat in sailor class, so he could be a sailor. I looked at his bag, he was definitely an outdoors man, but his clothes didn’t really say sailor. However, his longish wild hair and strong hands suggested maybe he was. I wasn’t sure what language he spoke. I couldn’t see the book he had tucked in the seat pocket, so I had a little look over his shoulder while he sent some text messages. Ah, Spanish!! Perfect!

 

Then I saw that he was writing to a woman and he was sorry he didn’t get a chance to call her before we left, but he loved her. Damn, always the way. So I put my head back and closed my eyes hoping to sleep the whole flight since I had such an early start to get to the airport.

 

After a little sleep, I opened my eyes and after 10 minutes he asked me in English why I was going to St Maarten. I told him I had just gotten my first job in the yachting industry on a motor yacht, although sailboats were really my thing.  He told me that he was going to race on a sailboat. I sighed out of jealousy and asked him about his job.  He has my ideal life. He recently bought his own sailboat and does delivery and race crew work for money. PERFECT!!!! He said he could help me find work if it didn’t work out with the motor yacht. It’s all about connections. I started thinking maybe it wasn’t so bad if I was a bit more outgoing, even on a plane.

 

I was actually really sleepy so after a chat, I got comfortable. Cliche, but true, our arms were touching on the armrest between us. I felt a warm electric shock running through my body and thought, “Oh Wow! It’s been a long time since I’ve felt this kind of energy connection with anyone.” I slept off and on, he always got me a drink or held my food tray for me if I was sleeping or in the bathroom. One time I woke up and he was sleeping so I positioned myself to be a little more cosy to him.  I could feel the warmth of his positive energy seering into my body as our lower backs and arms touched. It felt like a drug and I couldn’t get enough. In a sleepy state, I could feel him move and snuggle closer into me. I wanted to turn around and snuggle into his chest, but I restrained myself.

 

I could go on and on about the little romantic moments we shared in that oh so short 8 hour flight, but I’m sure some of you are already about to be sick, so I will just share one more. He was born in France, but spent a lot of time in St Martin so he knew the area very well. He was pointing out to me the islands as we passed them, which involved him leaning over me to point out the window. His face was so close, I could feel the warmth of his breath. I stopped listening to what he was saying because I was just willing him to turn his head and start kissing me. My heart was racing and I was so sad the flight was about to be over.

 

After we got off the plane, we ran ahead of everyone as he told me the immigration line queues up quickly and can take hours. We exchanged numbers as we waited for our luggage. I didn’t get any signal on my phone, so he waited outside with me to make sure I was ok. I realised I knew the name of the boat, but not the marina where I was staying. After a slight panic, I saw who I thought was the Captain and waved at him. I gave the plane man a big hug and thanked him for everything. As I ran off into the warm suffocating heat of the Caribbean he shouted, “I’ll message you!” I smiled and waved thinking, “Yeah right, that will never happen.”

 

I went on the boat, met everyone and settled in. I turned on wifi and received this message, “Thanks so much for the nice chat on the plane. I really wanted to kiss you.” I smiled a huge smile and squealed. It was a two way thing after all!!

 

As I said in the beginning, who knows if I will ever see him again (although we’ve had occasional contact in the last two months and he’s sailing his boat to Palma, where I am, at the moment…) or how the story will end. If nothing else, I take it as a beautiful message from the universe to remind me to always enjoy the moment and look forward. At that time, I had been pining for Captain Cool, thinking how nice it would be if I was flying to a job with him instead of with some strangers I had only spoken to for 15 minutes on the phone.  After I met the man on the plane and felt the spark, I was comforted that everything will be ok. There is no reason to feel sad that the chapter with CC has ended, but that I should be grateful the chapter existed. I learned how to sail, I learned so much about the sea and I learned how to love and live on a boat. These are all important lessons I will use in the future. Why be sad about them? The memories will not leave me and will always give me a smile. Whether it’s with the man on the plane, a different sailor or alone, the best way to live life is to keep walking with a smile and open eyes. I needed that reminder and for that, I’m grateful for that gift I received from the man on the plane.   

 

 

So long motor yachts…


As I was lying on the aft deck watching the stars turn on, I couldn’t help but wonder what on earth happened. Six weeks ago, I was in London in such a peaceful place even though I had no idea what was going to happen with my life and now I seemed to have turned 180 degrees. Sure I still know that everything will be ok eventually, but I have been neglecting my yoga and spiritual practices for parties and I feel empty, lonely and lost.    

I was in a fragile state that night after a ‘good’ night and morning out.  I turned my thoughts of panic and self-disappointment into kindness, acceptance and forgiveness of myself. One helpful trait I have is that I am a social chameleon so it’s easy for me to thrive in whatever environment I am thrown into. The bad thing about that is when it’s not such a healthy environment. I was strong the first couple of weeks saying no to drinks. Then I started getting really lonely and when everyone else was drinking, I thought, “Ok, why not? That’s just what people do.” Then I started seeing the person I was in my early 20’s come out and I thought, “Oh goodness. I really didn’t like her, I thought she had left…” So what did I do? Continued to delve deeper to try and throw away the disappointed feelings I felt about myself. Don’t get me wrong, I haven’t gone totally off the rails, this job is physically demanding and I wanted to keep it, so I had to be responsible. It was just that losing my connection with yoga meant I was no longer being true to myself.   

 

I didn’t really tell any of my supportive and good friends how I was feeling or what I was doing. Why worry people unnecessarily? Then I realised that actually, I was worried about me and some support would do me the world of good. So I turned to Captain Cool, the anchor of my life for two years. It all went well until the phone calls after I had a bit too much to drink. As I was feeling insecure, it didn’t take much to misinterpret or become over sensitive to certain comments. One morning I woke up to a stern text message that spoke a lot of truths I didn’t want to hear but needed to. I asked if I could visit him and just get some grounding. I didn’t know for how long because I handed in my notice for this job and just wanted some time to figure things out. He agreed. There was either miscommunication or him not really wanting to see a me that he didn’t know, but he told me with his work schedule I could only stay three days. It wasn’t worth the money and I had nowhere to go after that, so it didn’t make sense to go. I was very disappointed and he sent me an apologetic text saying that he was standing behind me and giving me strength. I rolled my eyes, left my phone at home and went out with my new friends to forget about the harm I have caused him and myself.

 

As I marvelled at the beauty of the day changing into night on this boat that has given me so many life lessons, I took the advice of a good friend and didn’t beat myself up. Then I started thinking about the yoga philosophy and how they say that too. Sure, the monkey in my brain went a little crazy and took over, but it doesn’t mean that all is lost. I mean, how many years have I not been the person that is coming out now? How many years have I been working on improving myself and succeeded? It’s just a little slip, I’m stronger than this. I’m not in a good environment for many reasons I won’t share, but the things I will share is because I don’t like my actual job role as a stewardess, nor do I like being on a motor yacht. I thought a boat on the sea was a boat on the sea, but no, it’s not. Sailboats move differently, they carry a different energy and they connect and dance with nature. It’s more about enjoying the journey then going as fast as you can to get to the next place. Motor yachts tear through the waves scaring off all of the lovely fish and mammals, burning tons of fuel as they rush to get to the next destination. As I write this, I notice that perhaps this is why I have lost myself. I really connect with the energy around me and perhaps it was that motor yacht energy I connected with.

 

I am throwing off that energy. I have no idea what I will do on the 1st of May when I am free from this boat. I’m going to look for a sailboat job as a deckhand, but maybe that’s not what the universe has in mind for me either. Therefore I am going to spread out feelers to my yoga and massage connections as well and just see what happens. All I know is that contrary to what CC said, I am all alone. We all are. No one can make a decision for me on what’s best or what I should do next. I will of course accept words of support and encouragement, but that won’t ever give me the path that’s true to me. It will however, give me the strength to keep walking forward, especially when I have some falls and breaks. Now if you excuse me, there are five big sailboats here at the marina so I must puff my chest up, update my CV and re-connect with the Yogini Sailor.        

Birthday brilliance

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If you’ve been following my blog for a while, you will know that last year I talked about not really enjoying my birthdays and that I was making a decision to let it go and think differently. First of all, I can’t believe it’s been a year. It feels like just yesterday I was in Cartagena dressing up to go out for a birthday lunch…

 

I’m pleased to say that I officially have let go! It’s my birthday today, I had actually forgotten most of the day. There were no anxieties about how many people would remember, if I was significant to other people, etc. The truth is, I’m not more or less significant than anyone else in the world and receiving millions of birthday messages doesn’t actually mean anything other than there are a lot of thoughtful or forgetful people in my life.

 

What mattered is that before I even got here, my new Captain told me the first party would be on the 13th after I sent him over my passport. On Saturday morning for our morning meeting, the engineer said ‘a very important topic is how are we going to celebrate Sarah’s birthday?’ We’re going to St Thomas tomorrow so we couldn’t have a big celebration tonight. And you know what? They gave me an absolutely amazing birthday celebration which lasted two days.  They introduced me to new friends, we had a birthday jacuzzi dip, a beautiful night out at a beach party where I chatted to three crazy French sailors about sailing, the sea and the meaning of life. It was a full moon and they all said I was glowing with positive energy, I could feel it and through all the beers I was given and puffs of the green stuff, I thought, “Yes, I really am living my life. On my birthday, with strangers on an amazing beach, under a full moon and feeling so incredibly loved by everyone and everything.”

 

The engineer was telling everyone it was my birthday which resulted in me being bought birthday beers. One of the three French sailors was chasing me around trying to kiss me because he said I had “sugar lips” and he just wanted to try them. When I finally gave in and let him in for a quick peck, he gave the loudest, “WOOOO HOOOOO!!!” I have ever heard in my life and said, “Yes! Wow, that was amazing, so much energy, so much goodness!” Then proceeded to take his clothes off and jump in the sea to feel even more pure. He of course kept following me for another one, but it just became hilarious and we all learned to have conversations with his commentary about my lips on the side. I’m sure he was on some kind of drug, but that was probably the most amazing reaction I have ever received from a peck on the lips! I could feel the radiation coming from me and really enjoyed spreading it out to those around me.

 

There were eight of us in a circle. All sailors of one kind and not one of us had our phone. We were on a beautiful beach with great company and knew that was going to happen, so why bring a phone to ruin it?!?! I thought, these are the types of people I want to be surrounded by for the rest of my life.

 

Then we went to a nightclub and got a lift from one of the three crazy French sailors. He had an amazing car with a great sound system and there was rap blasting on the radio. The engineer and I love rap and he was in the front so he turned it up super loud and all five of us in the car started throwing up our hands in the air and doing rap video dances. I was laughing and remembering how I probably did something similar (not on an island!!) about 15 years ago and that there is no need to grow up. I was seriously in heaven soaking up the happiness and beautiful people around me.

 

No one could believe I was turning 38. Everyone guessed under 30. In London, people always guessed above 30. There is something about the Caribbean air or maybe the sea that shaves 10 years off my face. My hair becomes lighter, grows faster and my nails grow at an astonishing rate. It’s amazing how much my body thrives in this environment. I feel so young, alive, energetic, vibrant and healthy.

 

They forced me to go out last night even though I was hungover. They weren’t so pushy with the drinks, but they made me stay up until midnight so that we could have the cake the chef made for me. They invited a bunch of people over to sing me happy birthday and I was so touched. I went to bed thinking how lucky I was to be alive, how thankful I am to my parents for giving me this life. Such a beautiful life that is hard at times, but that’s just what makes the beautiful times more beautiful.

 

You see what happens when you let go? Everything you were afraid of not happening, comes to you in such a beautiful and natural way.

 

I have been on the boat for five days now and I have about 10 blogworthy stories. However, I haven’t had the time to write because the work is full on and I’m exhausted afterwards, not to mention there is a new crew to get to know, new friends around the marina and a gorgeous island to explore before we go to the next one. All I will say is that this place is crazy, in a good way and I find myself pinching myself to see if this is all really real. Year 38 has started off brilliantly and I’m excited to see where the adventure is going to take me!

Damaging appearances

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It all started when I was in the USA and a seven year old little girl looked at my eyes and told me I had grandma wrinkles. I told her they were smile lines, not grandma wrinkles. She looked at me with determination and anger and shouted, “GRANDMA WRINKLES!!!” I smiled at her again to show her my lines and said calmly, “I see them as smile lines because I’m a happy person and I smile a lot.” She muttered, “Grandma wrinkles” and stomped off angrily. I thought how sad it was that the people in her life have gave her this perception. She is only seven and already thinking about appearances, it is such a sad world when children think like that.

 

After this, I was watching a TV program with my parents and on came this three minute commercial about cream for the neck and upper chest. It featured numerous female celebrities who had used this cream and said how young it made them look and how much they loved it.  Funny enough, a few months earlier when I was in Cartagena, I looked in the mirror and thought my age was starting to show on my neck, I simply brushed off such a shallow thought, but slathered more sun cream on that area to prevent any more damage. When I was watching this advert, I started panicking a bit about my looks and my age and god forbid I should actually look my real age one day. I found my hand involuntarily touching my neck as if it was to blame for the fact that I am getting older. Then the advert started talking about all of these freebies they would throw in and I found myself anxious to hear the price. When they said it, it was actually a rather decent price and of course came with a guarantee so if I didn’t see results, I would get my money back. I was so close to writing down the website and then I stopped myself. Why would I do that? Many women these days seem to have lost the ability to age gracefully. My grandmothers did not mess with a thing and I’m not even sure used face cream, yet they were still beautiful women. I guess it depends on your definition of beauty.

 

Not to mention, when you start getting botox, fillers, implants here there and everywhere, shit goes wrong when you get older. Trust me, I’m sure one woman I saw who was in her 50’s would tell you that she regretted everything she ever had done. Her face and lips were totally deformed, her boobs were rock solid in a midst of aging skin and her skin was leathered from being in the sun with no protection. She was a kind person, but her outside was not so beautiful.

 

Now back to the present. I am absolutely loving my time in London. It’s great because I’m not working much and I have a bike which gives me freedom to travel around for free (speaking of which I got good old Sky back with all of his parts and the bike shop did indeed reimburse me for everything and gave me a better lock for a discount!) and explore this incredible city. When I am coming home from somewhere, I love to take new roads or old roads that are new to me because it’s been a couple of years. It’s amazing! I am truly truly observing and seeing this incredibly magic city. The spirits of London, of which there are many are constantly guiding me. They speak to me at every corner I turn, every alley way I look in. It’s incredible! They are showing me new perspectives and truly opening my eyes to a peaceful way of living. They are telling me that this is not the place for me right now, but I am here so I should soak in all of the lessons that are being offered to me.

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I love the contrasts in London. Depending on the area, the buildings are different, the types of shops vary, the street life is different, the colours of people are different (but always with a mix of colours), the way people carry themselves is different. It’s really interesting to see. I’ve been spending a lot of time around Covent Garden and Marylebone in the last few days. There are a lot of shops, businesses and rich people around. I have been looking at the shops and the types of people that go into them. On the weekend Tommy Hilfiger near Harrods had such a huge crowd of people waiting for something that people were blocking the pavement and nearly pouring out into the streets. As I was rushing with excitement to meet a friend I hadn’t seen in over two years, I suddenly found this absurd. I shouldn’t judge I know, but that was my initial thought. It was probably some model or some new range of clothing that was coming.  People were using their precious life going there because they think it would make them look better than me who has no designer clothes or even anything that is considered fashionable. They place so much importance on how they look and who they wear that perhaps they are missing out on what really is important.

 

I realised that I too, in my previous life fell victim to this marketing. I wanted to have the latest fashion (at high street prices!), have an iPhone, live in a “cool” part of London, travel to exotic places, have lots of shoes, jackets and money to go to shows, good restaurants and goodness knows what else. I remember thinking that I wouldn’t go to my high school reunion because I didn’t have children or a husband or that Doctorate that I went for. Really, none of that matters and it wasn’t until I gave everything up, including fake appearances, that I finally felt free, confident and sure.

 

As I cycle around the more affluent areas of London, I notice how they are so much about appearances. I notice how they look at me just a bit longer than they do everyone else because I have an old dirty bike, a red sailing jacket (which needs a good wash but I don’t have a spare while it’s drying!), worn black mittens and a red bobbly Christmas ski hat that my friend lent me (thanks Jennie, it’s been the most valuable object I’ve received since coming here!!). They are either judging me, in disgust of such a scrub in their area or maybe they are grateful to see someone different to all the rest.  

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I went to an induction to teach private yoga for a mobile styling company (Blow Ltd). The majority of the people there were hair, make up and nail artists who were very concerned about their appearance. I rocked up not in the dress code because I don’t have black trousers or shoes, not wearing any make except a splash of eyeliner and I hadn’t even blow dried my hair. Just as a side note, when I looked in the mirror in the bathroom, my hair looked just as good as two of the girls who clearly worked hard to get their hair that way. They were really nice women and I couldn’t help but wonder what we would do with all this free time if we weren’t so concerned about wearing masks.

 

 

One reason why I went travelling was because I realised that I was getting a bit ridiculous and needed to learn how to live without these small luxuries. I was working so hard to maintain an appearance, that I stopped living because I was too busy working to fulfil this empty desire. My travelling goal was accomplished. I lived on a small and strict budget so that I could travel for a long time and when I came back, I would be ready to start a new career path with little money. Well, I’m not ready to settle here, but I certainly don’t need any more than what I already have. Nor do I really need all of what I have.  However, what I do have is more important than any object or appearance I could ever wish for. Peace and contentment. Buddha was right, you really do have to give up everything to find everything you are supposed to have.     

On the move again

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I honestly think my ancestors were gypsies. What really makes my blood start circulating and my heart racing is being on the move. I wrote this entry at the last night in my flat. The flat I moved into a short 27 days ago. I went through quite an adjustment and learning process in the last 27 days. It’s quite amazing actually!

 

Having a bike makes me feel like I’m travelling. It offers me complete freedom because it allows me to get around this huge and beautiful city for free. I get to see little alleyways that cars can’t go through and take detours that don’t add on time because I’m on a bike! The wind whips through my hair and the diesel fumes go up my nose, but I don’t care. I’m on the move and a smile always forms.

 

I was going to leave the end of March, but the spirits of London are telling me it’s time to go now. I have done what it called me here for. Don’t ask what that is, I do keep some things private 🙂 So I decided that I would like to start my 38th year how I want the rest of the year (and my life) to go, with adventure! I booked tickets to Palma, Mallorca for the 13th of March and am absolutely terrified! But incredibly excited and open to whatever journey I will go on.  

 

Anyway, I was homeless last weekend, so I took it as an opportunity to go to the countryside where I used to live and see my ex work colleagues/dear friends who I am still in touch with despite leaving the job and area more than six years ago. They housed me, fed me, chauffeured me around and one of them filled me with too much wine. I had a great time and felt very loved! Now I’m staying in a posh part of London, Angel, with another friend until I go.  

 

Then the scary part comes. Palma (unless I find a job before then!). I am going without knowing anyone, without knowing the area, without a job, but with all the faith and trust that Palma has something to offer me. Whether that’s a job or a lesson, I won’t know until I get there. I’m nervous, a bit scared, but really excited to see what this new chapter will offer me. So many people have told me I’m brave, I used to brush it off and say I’m just sticking up for my right to happiness, but the truth is, Yes I am. My courage has even given me a paid return ticket back from a good friend should all go wrong (not purchased, nor do we think it will be necessary).  

 

I will be sad to leave London again. My friends have supported me in ways that were beyond what friendship calls for. Probably because they know I would do exactly the same for them.  They admire me and want me to succeed because I’m going off the social norm of what I am “supposed” to be doing. Having such great support around me has recharged my strength. I was definitely in need of a recharge. With all of my free time, I have looked into various jobs and made contacts. I had some job leads and offers that would have developed into something more had I stayed here longer, but I firmly believe that everyone who walks into my life does so for a purpose. Many people I have met for brief periods of time have told me something which has made a long lasting positive impression, have helped me years later with something or have become significant people in my life. There is a reason for all of these people that have walked along with me on this London path and no doubt time will tell me what that is.   

 

For now, I am ready to go. I am ready to continue pursuing my dream, I am ready to work towards a life where the only concern I have is my very own sail boat, where I’m going to sail it to and who I should have with me.  With the strength and support of my friends, I will create new adventures, new stories, have new ups and downs and hopefully make a lasting positive impact on new people. I am very much looking forward to a new journey!