Change is possible

Wow, I didn’t realise just how much I’ve changed until I spent time on boats with landlubbers.I left Jamaica for Panama on a motor yacht with a beautiful group of New Zealanders. Life is a crazy thing. It’s interesting how some people firmly believe that people don’t change. Ask my Aunt, she knows they do. She knows me as well as my parents, but without the parent bias. I’m sure she could give you a run down on all the various changes I’ve gone through in my 37 short years of life. 

Five years ago, I would’ve come on this boat and thought, “Wow! How brilliant that I found a boat of people who are so similar to me.” Their sense of humour and outlook on life matched mine up until about two or three years ago. I was caught up in the rat race as well, concerned about the clothes I wore and how I looked, bored there was nothing to do, impatient, incredibly sarcastic and always winding people up. There’s nothing wrong with this. It’s common in the British culture and for ten years, I had fun and felt like I fit in. 

Fortunately, this travel bug does things to a person. If a person is open to receive it, it teaches you a lot about other ways to live, other morals and other perspectives on what it means to survive. You see all of those things I mentioned above? None of them apply to my personality now. As my clothes were hanging on a line to dry, I could see how my shirts have started to thin due to frequent use and hand washing. A lot of my underwear is forming holes. I own no designer clothing or anything over $10. I have one fancy bra that is worn and stretched out. I quite often forget to brush my hair, it’s always in a ponytail, what’s the point? I can’t even tell you the last time I used a blow dryer. Straighteners?? Even longer! The mascara and eye liner I use for special occasions is never used because I’ve gone so long without wearing it that I feel like a clown when I do. Plus I usually forget it’s on, so I itch my eyes and then have to run to the bathroom to fix it. 

I don’t care about wages or pay rises for I don’t have to live in a cool part of London, spend a lot of money to travel (I know how to do it cheaply now!) and buy the latest fashion. I told someone the other day that in the last year I made $2500 and she said, “Oh my god. How did you survive?” I said my food and accommodation is paid for, there isn’t a lot more I need. Her reply? “That’s amazing!” Yeah it is. It’s amazing because I no longer have to be bound by the rules society sets for me. I don’t have the material worries I was culturally brought up to have. I make my own rules and live in a way that brings me peace and contentment. 

Sure people talk down about my life and make fun of me. I know at least one person did it on the most recent boat. It doesn’t bother me. Now I get to walk through life relaxed and with a smile. Before I discovered this way of life, my shoulders were always hunched, my mind was infected with worry and stress and I was always striving to find something better instead of living for the moment. People who think I’m weird just haven’t found their peace yet, I get it. 

I guess that’s one reason why I feel so relaxed with Captain Cool. He’s the same. He also thinks I’m most beautiful when I’m natural so there’s no pressure to buy fancy clothes and spend all that time putting a false face on. For I could spend all that time applying make up and doing my hair and I’m still the same on the inside. That’s what I want people to see, not some beautiful face that isn’t even mine. CC encourages me to wear protective clothing so I don’t get sun burned. He doesn’t care that I don’t wear the latest sailing fashion or a bikini to get rid of the many farmer tans I have. While I’ve had a good time in the last few months, I’m really looking forward to sharing life again with someone who has similar views. With someone who just gets it without words and judgment. Someone I can just simply be with. 

I may not have a lot of money or a lot of things, and that’s exactly how I want it. I have something money can’t buy and those with money, try to buy. I sleep at night all through the night, I wake up refreshed and ready to join the day, even if I only had a few hours of sleep. I don’t worry about time, career goals, clothes, my weight, my age, fitting in, having the best, being the best, pensions or things that are never going to happen. I simply live in peace and at one with nature. Life has never been so beautiful, even during the difficult times. Why would I ask for more?

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