Friends are like jewellery. There are some diamonds, rubies, emeralds, sapphires, cubic zirconia and even some that are trendy and last a season like costume jewellery. I am fortunate to have found quite a few diamonds in my life. These are the friendships that last forever no matter how often you speak and how often or little you see each other.
Friends have always been so important to me because I often acted against my parent’s wishes and needed someone to confide in or collude with. Luckily even the “corrupted” ones had boundaries which kept me in check, thank goodness! If not for them, I would probably be a drug addicted stripper turned prostitute with countless children!
In my last visit to the States, I reconnected with one of my best friends from University. We met when we did a short course in archaeology together in Spain. We thought it was awesome to smoke cigarettes in the windowsill as we had never seen windows without screens before. A world without mosquitoes, how great!! She didn’t believe in ghosts until we talked about them. In the middle of the night, I went to go to the bathroom and on the way back, she thought I was a ghost and screamed and jumped in my bed. Then we fell into a fit of laughter which disturbed our other classmates! She is probably one of the few friends that has seen me at my absolute worst (I usually kept that to myself) and did nothing but hold my hand until I was ok. No questions, no judgments and no advice. It wasn’t what I needed and this diamond knew it. It had been eight years (we think!) since we last met. I can’t lie, when she emailed to see if I was around to meet up, my mind instantly looked for excuses. After all, it would be a two to two in a half hour drive. Not that I was super busy, mind you. Luckily my Aunt who had met this friend and loved her as much as I did, pushed me to do it. I’m so happy I did! I was in the car feeling very nervous. We have very different lives now and it had been so long. What if we have nothing to talk about? The instant I saw her, my eyes filled with tears and I just knew the time was going to go too fast and it wouldn’t be enough to catch up. After travelling and living in the Caribbean for a year, it was so great to say names of people and for her to know who they were. She had actually met them so I didn’t have to give a brief bio which never captured the essence of a person and made the story obsolete. We caught up, shared our views on life and were both sad when our time was up. It was eight years last time, how long will it be next time? The important thing is that it appears no matter how much time goes by, it will always be the same. This friendship is one of the finest jewels life has ever given me.
Around this time I Skyped with another good friend of mine. We met at a mutual friend’s birthday party. It seemed like fate, if you believe in that. Our energies instantly connected and we were both in similar places in our lives, grateful to find someone who just seemed to understand without many words! We chatted, we drank and we danced the night away. So much that our mutual friend went home and I stayed at my new diamond’s house. It was like a one night stand except I didn’t feel awful in the morning! It also led to a very deep and special friendship. We both started biking at the same time and so began our weekend adventures of meeting up early and just cycling in whatever direction until we found something interesting. She’s also the only person who has played tennis with me more than once. The first time, I showed up in my new tennis skirt I had for years and had never worn. She thought I was going to kick her ass. After five minutes, which consisted of her chasing my ball across all courts, she stopped and said, that’s why you look so good, you don’t know how to play!!! She wanted to lose some weight so I guess that’s why she agreed to go again! My beautiful friend is such a free spirit. She is so passionate, so loving and so giving. Because of her free spiritedness, it’s often days, weeks or now months (we used to live 10 minutes from each other) she will go without a reply. But I never mind. When I’m really down, she always responds when I need her. When I just want a fun chat, she’s not always around, but that’s ok. I know she will get in contact with me when she is able. When she does, she is always full of beautiful stories of love, helping other people and how her life journey is going. It fills me with inspiration and a feeling of pure connection until the next time. She is probably the only friend I have a had fight with, who I can tell she is being annoying because I don’t want to be happy in that moment or that she’s wrong and I don’t want to hear anymore (upon reflection she is always right!). That’s probably what makes her support so beautiful. She is always genuinely happy for me and wants to hear more of my journey. She says I’m an inspiration to her which makes me feel so loved. Again, another beautiful jewel life has given me.
I can name numerous other jewels who make my life just that much more worth living and I’m sure in time with my writing, they will come out. However, these two are from distinct times of my life who reappeared back into my life at a time when I most needed their sparkle.
I love living in a new place and meeting new people. However, there’s always something missing in the new place. My diamonds nearby who I can make new stories with, lean on for support when needed and who know the other people in my life. Of course I will find new jewels with time, I am a social person. However in the transition time, it is these diamonds in my life that I am so very grateful for and treasure more ever than before. After all, without my jewellery, I may be on such a different path and it is because of their support that I gave up the rat race to live a lifestyle much more suited to me. What beautiful gems!